WE NEED A NEW
The subject of death is treated as a taboo in our society. Our knowledge of grief is therefore very limited.
Most people feel uncomfortable when faced with mortality – both their own and that of others. Therefore, they avoid people in grief or give us well-meant, but inappropriate advice such as “Don’t be sad”, “You have to be strong now” or “You are still young”.
With sentences like this, they try to alleviate our pain and their own helplessness – but that doesn’t work.
GRIEF IS HEALTHY.
Grief is our natural and healthy response to loss. It is a necessary process that helps us deal with changes after turning points in life, and to create something new.
Grief is not an illness. It cannot be “cured”. But if it is suppressed, it can make us sick. Grief wants to be lived and expressed.
GRIEF NEEDS EXPRESSION
It is a basic need of every person to be seen by others. In grief we need the closeness of other people who respect and accept our situation.
We need a safe space where we can talk and express ourselves without fear. We want to be seen and heard without feeling valued or criticized.
GRIEF IS INDIVIDUAL.
The experience of grief is a universal element of human experience and connects all of us. At the same time, each loss is different and associated with an individual grief process.
Some losses shake us in our foundations. The death of a partner, a child (also in the very early stages of pregnancy), a family member or friend are deep cuts in the history of our lives. Losing a loved pet can also trigger a deep grief process.
Grief has no fixed time period. There is no moment when grief is suddenly over. There is no “normal” grieving process. Nobody has the right to tell you when you have grieved “enough”.
You can learn to deal with your grief in a loving way, and to consciously accept it as part of your life. You can always feel connected to the person you have lost. And at the same time you can reshape your life so that you can again experience happiness and find meaning.
GRIEF TOUCHES US DEEPLY.
The loss of a loved one confronts us with the reality of death. It reminds us of how fragile life is. We can suddenly understand that we will lose more people. And that at some point, we will also have to go ourselves.
Grief brings us into contact with the basic transience of life. It can lead us to the question of how we want to continue to use the limited time we have. Perhaps this will even give us the opportunity to find something sparkling and valuable in the depth of the dark.